How Not To Be A Jerk when Online Dating

Step 1: Do not fall in love with a profile.

I have a confession to make. I’ve both tried and liked online dating. I know that it can still be seen as a little embarrassing or a last resort but I don’t think that’s fair. I like the fact that you can know a reasonable amount about a person before you make a move, I like that if someone turns out to be a nutbar, you never have to actually spend your precious time on them, and I like being able to creep through people’s profiles for days on end. It’s a bit of fun. So I’ve spent time on OkCupid and Tinder, and I feel like there is a definite market for an anti-dickhead behaviour post. I mean, there is already a plethora of blogs like these that shine the light on dickish behaviour in the online dating world, but we all know how I like to help. I just think that if you exhibit some or any of these behaviours, you should rethink a few life choices to make yourself more palatable to the average electronic love-seeker:

*Just a note, this is obviously coming from a lady perspective. I’m going to try to be fair and non-gendered and what not, but I promise little.

A Letter To: People Who Don’t Want A Flyer

It doesn’t have to be like this *Stolen from somethingofthatilk.com

Dear People Who Don’t Want a Flyer

When you see someone standing with a bunch of flyers for the local take-away, restaurant or nightclub, what are you thinking? Because I am one of these terrifying purveyors of advertising material sometimes, and I’d like to let you in on a few trade secrets. It might help you to feel less frightened and/or annoyed and help me and my fellow hander-outterers to have a better day.

Firstly, no-one wants to be doing this job. You may be surprised to learn that we don’t have little kids sitting in maths or English dreaming of the day that they can stand around and hand out slips of paper to people. That said, it’s often a choice between rushing around, wiping sweat off my forehead and looking after hen’s parties or standing outside in (maybe) sun and ogling attractive Englishmen. Hmm. What a choice. Hmmmmm. Obviously being a bit of a creep is going to win out every time. Basically, I’m just asking you to have a bit of understanding and realise that we are people who really wouldn’t mind a smile to liven up a probably dull couple of hours. Especially if you happen to be an attractive Englishman. You could even have a go at a wink, you know, if you wanted.

 

How Not To Be A Jerk When You’re On a Hen’s or Stag Night.

Obligation friend that everyone finds mildly annoying.

Well, I haven’t posted in a long time. It’s been weighing on my mind for a while considering I have a few great ideas coming up, but unfortunately, I’m unable to live my life without procrastinating over something. Seeing as uni is finished for a few months, blogging is the latest victim of Facebook chat, Netflix and Reddit. I’ve also been busy starting my new job as a waitress and general bar wench, hence why I have SO MANY new ideas for blogs coming up. I’m fairly sure that there is no better example of douchebaggery than what is displayed to customer service people. While there are a multitude of examples I could go with, I just worked a Saturday day shift at a pub frequented by Stag and Hen Parties. I don’t feel I can go another day without telling the world (or a small percentage of which) how and why they suck giant balls. And more importantly, how NOT to do so.

How Not To Be A Jerk: When You’re Travelling

“Why did I bring so many bags, and how did I carry them to this point?”

You learn a lot of things about yourself when you spend much time in a foreign country. Throwing yourself into another culture can be daunting, even if the culture shock is confined to weather patterns and a bizarre over-surplus of pre-packaged sandwiches. As I’ve travelled around various countries, I’ve noticed that this culture shock can lead to a certain accidental dickishness. In the interests of fellow travellers, long suffering locals and repairing the Aussie and/or backpacker stereotype, here are some of the things we can do to stop being jerks while sampling the wonders that other countries have to offer.

How Not To Be A Jerk: In A Lecture

One of the main features of university life is sitting through seemingly endless lectures. In most degrees, lectures are going to be a pretty major part of the learning process. Some will be the kind of lecture that you look forward to, either because it’s a great topic that you’re super interested in, or because you fancy the lecturer. Unfortunately, it’s much more likely that lectures will be a chore that you feel happy to skip should you sleep in an extra 10 minutes and realise that coffee beforehand is no longer an option. Considering how most lectures are already going to be tough, I’ve put together some tips on how to make each one a little bit better for all of us. To do this, I’ve used my vast experience in attending the first three lectures of any given subject I’m supposed to be doing.

How Not To Be A Jerk: On Valentine’s Day

Ah, February 14^th. What an enigmatic day you are. For some, you are Valentine’s Day, a day to do romantic things for your special someone and loudly and publicly proclaim how much you think they are the bee’s knees (Spoiler: They are not only the bee’s knees, but entire LEGS! <333 bbz). For others, it is Single’s Awareness Day. A constant barrage of advertisements and media tells you how important and wonderful it is to be in a relationship while you just sit around, eating chocolate and waiting for it to be over. Or you might just be sick of both of these groups taking over a perfectly good Thursday to fill with their ridiculous commercialised romance dictated by consumerism, a fact that you are (ahem, I am) happy to tell anyone who mentions the holiday. Now, despite my own preferences, I’m not here to say that everyone should belong to a certain group. What I will do is deviate a little from my normal format, and just give a few tips on how to be in your preferred group without being a jerk. Happy? Good.

How Not To Be Jerk At Your Work Christmas Party

Tis the season to be jolly, or so I’ve been told. By jolly, I obviously mean wracking your brain for present ideas, avoiding Christmas Carols in order to preserve sanity, and going to a thousand-and-one party’s to celebrate another year winding to a close. One of the parties you may have coming up or have vague memories of attending already is the office or workplace Christmas bash. They come in all shapes and sizes, but there seem to be inevitable moment when people who are fabulous to work with turn into some sort of nightmare elf once the tinsel is put up. Here are some tips that I have learnt at great cost in the last few years to help us all out.

How Not To Be A Jerk: At The Cinema

It’s a really exciting time for movies right now. Whether you like action, sci-fi, adventure, or a genre that is less awesome, there’s sure to be something you’ll want to catch over the Christmas holidays. I managed to see Looper the other day in the cinema, starring the gorgeous Joseph Gordon-Levitt and patron saint of the badass Bruce Willis, and thoroughly enjoyed it. Although my love of film is a very new and admittedly immature love, I feel like the few times I’ve been recently give me the right to self-promote myself as an expert on cinema etiquette. I have seen some jerk behaviour impact my cinema experience, and also been admonished for behaviour of my own. SO! Here are some tips of what not to do if you don’t want popcorn thrown at your head.

How Not To Be A Jerk: When You’re Writing A Speech

Speeches are things that we all have to either listen to or give at some point in our lives. Every major event or presentation requires speeches. So seeing as they’re something that we do so often, you would think we would all be able to do them well. Well, I’m sure you’re aware being a person that is alive that they are not easy. They’re very hard. They’re so hard to do that some people have to have a professional speech writer to write their words for them. They’re so hard that often we sit there listening to a speech trying not to accidentally finish our champagne out of pure desperation before the toast. In the interest of my future champagne-challenged dignity, these are a few ways to avoid being a speech jerk.

How Not to be a Jerk: When you are sexist

With all the furore and discussion that’s been kicked up around Prime Minister Julia Gillard’s misogyny speech and Tracey Spicer’s letter to Mr Sexist, I’ve been thinking a lot about what it all means. I’ve been trawling message boards and online newspapers to see what’s being said. What’s come out of it is that 1: people who comment on online newspaper articles love a bit of moral outrage, 2: my favourite football team are in a serious pickle and 3: sexism and feminism are still big confusing items for many people.  Now, if you are sexist or think feminism is just a bunch of hairy, shouty lesbians, fine. Do us a favour though, and please take a look at these ways to not be a big fat jerk about it.